Boy, you know you're blending your life with someone when you reorganize the books.
I've always kind of thought that books we've dragged through moves and changes are those we especially like and use. I mean, why would we go to the effort otherwise? Books are friends we reach for when we want comfort and information, or just want to again feel the leather of the fraying spine as we find a favorite passage or long forgotten bookmark.
Books of my dad's - those written by him and read by him - sit next to treasured compilations of Shakespeare and Homer and Dickens. Bibles, bibles, everywhere: big ones, small ones, pocket ones, ones missing spines from generations of use. Little bound books of poetry from girlhood and first editions of children's books - Robert Louis Stevenson and Aesop's fables - and the generations of telling and re-telling the magic inside, father to daughter, mother to son.
Look at the spines! The Rolling Stones and Beatles, space flight and war, atlases, American coins and Baseball (cards, collectibles, folklore, and fame) right next to Chaucer and Keats, Astronomy and antique watches, gardening, the Tolkien trilogies and Hoyle. It all fits.
We will come here again and again to pull from the shelves, visit and take comfort from the books we know and learn those we have not met. We will see the things that shaped each other's lives. Which book will I start with, I wonder, to pull from the shelves and discover more about his history and interests and passions? Coins, I am thinking: definitely coins.
Jan 27, 2010
Jan 26, 2010
Begin As You Mean To Go On
This whole engagement and wedding thing has been amazing. I mean, to be asked to marry someone while decorating the Christmas tree, how could it get any better?
And then came the permission phase with my sons, who were gracious and happy for us, and his daughters who responded with such love and welcoming it still makes me tear up.
And oh the ring! I looked down into the first glittering jewel case I came to and this ring practically chose me instead of the other way around. Once it was on and weighing down my finger, well, I had no choice but to fall for it, and I mean hard. It took less than a minute for us to find each other.
Setting the date and finding the venue seemed daunting and it's a good thing about the internet, because without it there would be no need for a venue or date. We checked out a dozen spots, none of them right, and kind of reluctantly headed up to Auburn, you know, so we could dismiss it in person. It is too expensive, too far, too fussy, and we budgeted a half an hour before we'd be on our way.
Oh, but really, Alfred was their secret weapon with his welcoming charm as he showed us the Irish Pub with bright marigold colored walls and deep leather sofas that serve the most wonderful hamburgers on the West Coast. We could almost hear the happy sounds of family conversations going on all at once as we walked through the Victorian Inn that was big enough to practically fit all of us together. And the dancefloor with those muted lights and candles called out to us, try me! and we did and it fit us just right. Dancefloors almost never do that. And then The Closer, Alfred the Diabolical, came in with a smoking deal.
It's sometimes like that, don't you think, that life storms your world because some things are just meant to become part of you? Take for instance yesterday's offer by a friend-of-a-friend who is a new entrepreneur wedding photographer and offered to take pictures in exchange for advertising. I mean, just like that?
And on that very same day, not to be outdone by a great deal by the Innkeeper and photographer, RMan's boss made a generous, we're talking Generous, contribution to the wedding fund. Can you imagine any boss anywhere doing that? Which is why we're voting for him next time the Boss of the Year competition comes around. And we'll each vote twice if needed.
On August 19, 1979, my mother's best friend passed on some marriage advice on her 30th wedding anniversary: 'Begin as you mean to go on.' If the last two and a half years are any indication of the thirty to come, sprinkled with the generosity of giving and receiving, it will be a life of blessings beyond measure.
And then came the permission phase with my sons, who were gracious and happy for us, and his daughters who responded with such love and welcoming it still makes me tear up.
And oh the ring! I looked down into the first glittering jewel case I came to and this ring practically chose me instead of the other way around. Once it was on and weighing down my finger, well, I had no choice but to fall for it, and I mean hard. It took less than a minute for us to find each other.
Setting the date and finding the venue seemed daunting and it's a good thing about the internet, because without it there would be no need for a venue or date. We checked out a dozen spots, none of them right, and kind of reluctantly headed up to Auburn, you know, so we could dismiss it in person. It is too expensive, too far, too fussy, and we budgeted a half an hour before we'd be on our way.
Oh, but really, Alfred was their secret weapon with his welcoming charm as he showed us the Irish Pub with bright marigold colored walls and deep leather sofas that serve the most wonderful hamburgers on the West Coast. We could almost hear the happy sounds of family conversations going on all at once as we walked through the Victorian Inn that was big enough to practically fit all of us together. And the dancefloor with those muted lights and candles called out to us, try me! and we did and it fit us just right. Dancefloors almost never do that. And then The Closer, Alfred the Diabolical, came in with a smoking deal.
It's sometimes like that, don't you think, that life storms your world because some things are just meant to become part of you? Take for instance yesterday's offer by a friend-of-a-friend who is a new entrepreneur wedding photographer and offered to take pictures in exchange for advertising. I mean, just like that?
And on that very same day, not to be outdone by a great deal by the Innkeeper and photographer, RMan's boss made a generous, we're talking Generous, contribution to the wedding fund. Can you imagine any boss anywhere doing that? Which is why we're voting for him next time the Boss of the Year competition comes around. And we'll each vote twice if needed.
On August 19, 1979, my mother's best friend passed on some marriage advice on her 30th wedding anniversary: 'Begin as you mean to go on.' If the last two and a half years are any indication of the thirty to come, sprinkled with the generosity of giving and receiving, it will be a life of blessings beyond measure.
Jan 20, 2010
Huzzah! Huzzah!
Now THAT'S what I'm talkin' about!From the Associated Press, 1.20.09:
Scott Brown, once a little-known Republican state senator, has pulled off one of the biggest political upsets in recent memory, beating Democratic Massachusetts Attorney General Martha Coakley 52 percent to 47 percent in the special election to replace the late Sen. Ted Kennedy.
Brown ran an energetic, outsider's campaign in a year that Gallup has called the most anti-incumbent since the Watergate era. His populist message tapped into a deep well of voter anger and frustration and gave him a massive, 75 percent advantage among independent voters, who make up more than half of the electorate.
"Tonight, the independent majority has delivered a great victory," Brown said in his victory speech Tuesday night. "I will remember that while the honor is mine, this Senate seat belongs to no one person, no one political party, and as I said before and you heard it today, this is the people's seat."
The raucous audience at the event interrupted Brown frequently, with chants of 'Go, Scott, go!' and 'Gas up the truck,' a reference to the pickup he used to crisscross the state.
Brown also spoke of Ted Kennedy, calling him "a tireless worker and a big-hearted public servant who, for most of his lifetime, was a force like no other in this state. There's no replacing a man like that, but tonight I honor the memory and I pledge to be the very best, worthy successor to the late Sen. Kennedy."
Jan 19, 2010
It's On Us
Today I am thinking about an excerpt I read from a book written by Lee Iacocca about the perilous times we're in and, generally, how we need to stand up and shout ourselves hoarse in order to effect change.
It's easy to get the old juices flowing when he points out thing after thing that we know is true and, damn it, why haven't we done something about that before now! I have listened for 50 years to the refrain of 'throw the bums out of Washington'. We absolutely should monitor our borders better and not squeeze our middle class to maintain a National lifestyle. I enthusiastically embrace moving toward eliminating our dependence on foreign oil - (Did I miss Chrysler leading the charge to embrace the development of solar or electric hybrids?) No matter.
At first glance, it does seem right to believe we should solve our domestic crises before giving it away to the world. But then comes a whopper of a natural disaster like in Haiti, with unimaginable loss and suffering, and I wonder who among us would prefer the US not to throw its resources behind a relief effort to help in whatever way possible? A simple show of hands will do.
We are complacent citizens. It's unfortunate but true that in our country we have great faith and a belief that good will prevail, even when faced with proof to the contrary. It is one of our greatest assets, our strong sense of American honor, and why we find ourselves at this uncomfortable juncture.
Remember settling for the lesser of two evils - even for President? Me, too. I can't say I have ever picketed the state capitol or attended a Town Hall meeting when I felt our country had veered off course.
We the People are out of shape! We rely on the entertainment media to ask what we hope will be hard enough questions so we can decide where to mark our x, and they do the job half-heartedly hoping a good scandal breaks that is infinitely more alluring. Ratings, you know.
We don't try very hard to pin our candidates down on compelling social and political issues. Our voices are becoming no more than an angry whisper over dinner when we feel our government is not representing the principles we believe it should. Voices are even dimmer in the voting booth, where our choices are only those who had the perseverence, the money, and the political connections to make it that far.
I'd like to say I've opened my wallet and my home for a candidate whose experience and sense of right aligned with mine, or that I've kicked and screamed when all the qualified Presidential candidates were not given airtime because they weren't as attractive or dynamic, but that's not true. I along with everyone else allows the staggering costs of TV ads to cull from the herd those candidates who cannot afford political office regardless of their vision and how well they honor the principles of our democracy. A John F. Kennedy type of man from humble origins might very well be sitting at home wondering how America has prevented him from reaching us because he cannot buy his way in.
We have forgotten how to participate in our own democracy. It's on us.
It's easy to get the old juices flowing when he points out thing after thing that we know is true and, damn it, why haven't we done something about that before now! I have listened for 50 years to the refrain of 'throw the bums out of Washington'. We absolutely should monitor our borders better and not squeeze our middle class to maintain a National lifestyle. I enthusiastically embrace moving toward eliminating our dependence on foreign oil - (Did I miss Chrysler leading the charge to embrace the development of solar or electric hybrids?) No matter.
At first glance, it does seem right to believe we should solve our domestic crises before giving it away to the world. But then comes a whopper of a natural disaster like in Haiti, with unimaginable loss and suffering, and I wonder who among us would prefer the US not to throw its resources behind a relief effort to help in whatever way possible? A simple show of hands will do.
We are complacent citizens. It's unfortunate but true that in our country we have great faith and a belief that good will prevail, even when faced with proof to the contrary. It is one of our greatest assets, our strong sense of American honor, and why we find ourselves at this uncomfortable juncture.
Remember settling for the lesser of two evils - even for President? Me, too. I can't say I have ever picketed the state capitol or attended a Town Hall meeting when I felt our country had veered off course.
We the People are out of shape! We rely on the entertainment media to ask what we hope will be hard enough questions so we can decide where to mark our x, and they do the job half-heartedly hoping a good scandal breaks that is infinitely more alluring. Ratings, you know.
We don't try very hard to pin our candidates down on compelling social and political issues. Our voices are becoming no more than an angry whisper over dinner when we feel our government is not representing the principles we believe it should. Voices are even dimmer in the voting booth, where our choices are only those who had the perseverence, the money, and the political connections to make it that far.
I'd like to say I've opened my wallet and my home for a candidate whose experience and sense of right aligned with mine, or that I've kicked and screamed when all the qualified Presidential candidates were not given airtime because they weren't as attractive or dynamic, but that's not true. I along with everyone else allows the staggering costs of TV ads to cull from the herd those candidates who cannot afford political office regardless of their vision and how well they honor the principles of our democracy. A John F. Kennedy type of man from humble origins might very well be sitting at home wondering how America has prevented him from reaching us because he cannot buy his way in.
We have forgotten how to participate in our own democracy. It's on us.
Jan 18, 2010
Just As It Is
Life is hopeful in these days before the wedding, when holding hands feels just right with just the right kind of warmth. We notice everything. Take for instance our negotiations and how we communicate with a natural sense of compromise already built in. That is one of my favorite things.
Getting married in our 50s is much more fun than it was when we were young. No doubt our seasoning, weathering, experiences, and age - whatEVER! - has given us time to explore our mature selves in a way that makes marriage more of a fit than a risk. There's a comfortable companionability as we settle in to an intimate cluster of 40 on account of all the children, grandchildren, great-grandkids, brothers and whatnot. The nest is well feathered, that's for sure.
We were talking last night about what it would have been like had we met in our 20s. I think about that now, and about the sons I treasure and celebrate, and all of life that has washed over and softened my edges. I do so love RMan's gentle lived-in heart and the patina that makes him so exceptionally right for me. And so to thoughts of what could have been I say, the beauty of us is deepened by what we valued in our lives and carried along, all the magnificent moments of love and joy and the hard lessons, too. I think life is exactly right, just as it is.
Getting married in our 50s is much more fun than it was when we were young. No doubt our seasoning, weathering, experiences, and age - whatEVER! - has given us time to explore our mature selves in a way that makes marriage more of a fit than a risk. There's a comfortable companionability as we settle in to an intimate cluster of 40 on account of all the children, grandchildren, great-grandkids, brothers and whatnot. The nest is well feathered, that's for sure.
We were talking last night about what it would have been like had we met in our 20s. I think about that now, and about the sons I treasure and celebrate, and all of life that has washed over and softened my edges. I do so love RMan's gentle lived-in heart and the patina that makes him so exceptionally right for me. And so to thoughts of what could have been I say, the beauty of us is deepened by what we valued in our lives and carried along, all the magnificent moments of love and joy and the hard lessons, too. I think life is exactly right, just as it is.
Jan 14, 2010
Guilty Pleasures
There's this little thing I enjoy every morning. After my morning constitutional and cup of coffee, it's first up. And I think you might like it, too.
I read Nat the Fat Rat's blog. I know, you're busy and skeptical of the postings by someone who would call themselves a rat. But it's a gem of a read and Natalie writes like a dream, mixing together in a big pot sweetness, tartness, and a full helping of joy about this crazy world we live in. And serves it up with a yummy sense of humor that comes straight from the heart.
Here's a couple of her laugh-aloud posts. Bon appetit!
----- POST A ------
I have a few questions about this Old Testatment stuff.
So, Adam lives to be nine hundred and thirty, Enos finally dies at nine hundred and five. Then somehow Mahaleel only makes it to sixty-five? Sixty-five! And I wonder, what happened there? They don't go into much detail. Was he eaten by something? Something large? ...
I am awfully glad we're not living to be nine hundred years old anymore. In my family we have a knack for outliving our mental capacities. My dear Aunt Beulah and I once carried on the same conversation for five years solid.
"Is that your son?"
"No Aunt Beulah, that's my brother."
"Oh ... is that your son?"
I like the story of Noah particularly. I like the idea of God surveying all that man had become and deciding, Nope, This Won't Do At All, and then just starting over from scratch. That happens to me a lot in the kitchen. ... I like how after the waters had dried God looked around and said, Well, I Won't Do That Again. That also happens to me a lot in the kitchen. ...
----- POST B ------
The fact of the matter is, it is cold outside. It is the kind of cold where errands leave you frozen and chapped, where any flakes that fall are just remnants of dead clouds, clouds mercilessly attacked by icy winds. Cloud dandruff. Because it is cold.
I wasn't going to go running today because, have you heard? It is freezing. It is so cold that even the dogs don't want to be outside. Serious business cold.
I had grand plans for myself and the treadmill. We had a date, the two of us. In a heated bedroom. With Hulu on the laptop. And the The Holbs (husband) made this sort of off-handed comment you know. Something or other about being a wimp? Or that maybe I wasn't man enough to handle the elements? References to poultry?
Suddenly my afternoon contained one three-mile tour of the frozen tundra, but I had conditions. You know, terms. The terms were that he had to go running with me and also wasn't allowed to complain about how slow I am. Then I put on every article of clothing I owned. Cause it's cold, guys!
I will skip the part of the story where I started off faster than The Holbs expected and he had to sprint to catch up with me; I will skip the part where he complimented my form so as not to brag; I'll also skip the part where I blasted it up the hill and didn't even stop once even though I really wanted to; I will also skip the part where The Holbs had to pee in the porta potty on the trail. What I will NOT skip is the part where The Holbs had a cramp in his side and I did not, because this merits some elaboration.
So The Holbs, he gets this cramp, see.
Ow he says. He slows down.
What's the matter? I say, not nicely, but in more of a tauntingly nature you understand.
I have a side ache! he wheezes.
You have a side ache?! I am incredulous. This is the captain of the high school soccer team, the 'I-run-for-fun' guy. I checked for my side cramp. My side cramp wasn't there!
Oh Ho! I shout. It is dawning on me. I have just kicked my husband's trash.
You gonna be okay? Are you having a heart attack? I am not really concerned, let's not forget.
No, no just not used to running is all ...
I am tuning him out here and also maybe doing some jumping jacks, you know. Oh well, see you at home, I say.
I start to trot off. Then I ran hard. The Holbs nearly caught up with me about a block away from the house but I ran even faster. I didn't know my stumpy fatty legs could go that fast! And you know what? Through a little side-ache luck, I totally beat that danged redheaded ding dong home. Little old me! Well lah-dee-dah.
-----
http://www.natthefatrat.com/
I read Nat the Fat Rat's blog. I know, you're busy and skeptical of the postings by someone who would call themselves a rat. But it's a gem of a read and Natalie writes like a dream, mixing together in a big pot sweetness, tartness, and a full helping of joy about this crazy world we live in. And serves it up with a yummy sense of humor that comes straight from the heart.
Here's a couple of her laugh-aloud posts. Bon appetit!
----- POST A ------
I have a few questions about this Old Testatment stuff.
So, Adam lives to be nine hundred and thirty, Enos finally dies at nine hundred and five. Then somehow Mahaleel only makes it to sixty-five? Sixty-five! And I wonder, what happened there? They don't go into much detail. Was he eaten by something? Something large? ...
I am awfully glad we're not living to be nine hundred years old anymore. In my family we have a knack for outliving our mental capacities. My dear Aunt Beulah and I once carried on the same conversation for five years solid.
"Is that your son?"
"No Aunt Beulah, that's my brother."
"Oh ... is that your son?"
I like the story of Noah particularly. I like the idea of God surveying all that man had become and deciding, Nope, This Won't Do At All, and then just starting over from scratch. That happens to me a lot in the kitchen. ... I like how after the waters had dried God looked around and said, Well, I Won't Do That Again. That also happens to me a lot in the kitchen. ...
----- POST B ------
The fact of the matter is, it is cold outside. It is the kind of cold where errands leave you frozen and chapped, where any flakes that fall are just remnants of dead clouds, clouds mercilessly attacked by icy winds. Cloud dandruff. Because it is cold.
I wasn't going to go running today because, have you heard? It is freezing. It is so cold that even the dogs don't want to be outside. Serious business cold.
I had grand plans for myself and the treadmill. We had a date, the two of us. In a heated bedroom. With Hulu on the laptop. And the The Holbs (husband) made this sort of off-handed comment you know. Something or other about being a wimp? Or that maybe I wasn't man enough to handle the elements? References to poultry?
Suddenly my afternoon contained one three-mile tour of the frozen tundra, but I had conditions. You know, terms. The terms were that he had to go running with me and also wasn't allowed to complain about how slow I am. Then I put on every article of clothing I owned. Cause it's cold, guys!
I will skip the part of the story where I started off faster than The Holbs expected and he had to sprint to catch up with me; I will skip the part where he complimented my form so as not to brag; I'll also skip the part where I blasted it up the hill and didn't even stop once even though I really wanted to; I will also skip the part where The Holbs had to pee in the porta potty on the trail. What I will NOT skip is the part where The Holbs had a cramp in his side and I did not, because this merits some elaboration.
So The Holbs, he gets this cramp, see.
Ow he says. He slows down.
What's the matter? I say, not nicely, but in more of a tauntingly nature you understand.
I have a side ache! he wheezes.
You have a side ache?! I am incredulous. This is the captain of the high school soccer team, the 'I-run-for-fun' guy. I checked for my side cramp. My side cramp wasn't there!
Oh Ho! I shout. It is dawning on me. I have just kicked my husband's trash.
You gonna be okay? Are you having a heart attack? I am not really concerned, let's not forget.
No, no just not used to running is all ...
I am tuning him out here and also maybe doing some jumping jacks, you know. Oh well, see you at home, I say.
I start to trot off. Then I ran hard. The Holbs nearly caught up with me about a block away from the house but I ran even faster. I didn't know my stumpy fatty legs could go that fast! And you know what? Through a little side-ache luck, I totally beat that danged redheaded ding dong home. Little old me! Well lah-dee-dah.
-----
http://www.natthefatrat.com/
Jan 8, 2010
To Each His Own
I know online dating gets a bad rap. People say it opens the door for potential creeps to have access to unsuspecting women, women that were fairly sheltered and innocent about the world. I'll give you I didn't have much experience when I started online dating and a few of my friends were the same way.
But what online dating DID did do is open the door to a world we wanted to step into in a way that felt safe to explore. It gave us a chance to learn the rules of dating in this modern world and to feel the exhiliration of being found interesting and pretty and sexy. It gave us practice at small talk and readied us for face to face meetings and eventually to open our hearts to someone new. We stepped into mud a time or two on that steep learning curve but we didn't stay there.
Dating sites also connect people who are looking just for friendship. I made two lifelong friends online with people of integrity and heart that literally changed my life.
Without venues like POF and eH, Randy and I don't think our paths would have organically crossed. I have several girlfriends whose lives are now rich and fulfilling, in real time and in real life. And so to the online detrators I say, to each his own journey towards fulfillment. I can't imagine not having found my way here.
But what online dating DID did do is open the door to a world we wanted to step into in a way that felt safe to explore. It gave us a chance to learn the rules of dating in this modern world and to feel the exhiliration of being found interesting and pretty and sexy. It gave us practice at small talk and readied us for face to face meetings and eventually to open our hearts to someone new. We stepped into mud a time or two on that steep learning curve but we didn't stay there.
Dating sites also connect people who are looking just for friendship. I made two lifelong friends online with people of integrity and heart that literally changed my life.
Without venues like POF and eH, Randy and I don't think our paths would have organically crossed. I have several girlfriends whose lives are now rich and fulfilling, in real time and in real life. And so to the online detrators I say, to each his own journey towards fulfillment. I can't imagine not having found my way here.
Jan 6, 2010
It's Nothing Personal
An out of work friend and I saw Up in the Air yesterday. Have you seen it? It's the story of a man who has made a life of cutting people loose. Any movie that prompts a heartfelt discussion about intrinsic value earns a gold seal of approval. It was a great flick.
It's a weird moment to realize someone thinks they can do without us. It feels bad. But here we sit, with an exceptional work ethic and oodles of skills, watching a movie on a Tuesday afternoon that we could have starred in. How ironic.
Do you remember the part in You've Got Mail when Tom Hanks tried to use the lame excuse of 'It's nothing personal' to explain why he had put Meg Ryan's bookstore out of business and was skewered with the reply 'That just means it's not personal to you. But it's personal to me.' I think about that after the umpteenth call from a friend telling me they have joined the ranks of the unemployed. Does anyone even see us anymore?
In addition to the money thing, which is huge, people seem to be discovering they have inadvertently upended the value of jobs in their lives. Jobs are no longer just places they spend their time. People's lives have become subtexts to their jobs rather than the other way around. As long as things are in balance, life feels pretty good. There are buddies to lunch with and get togethers after work to commisserate over bosses. But when a layoff comes, and the shock wears off, what is left is a void where a life should be. No longer having the shared commonality thrusts them into exile as their job/career network dissolves.
I believe in the tried and true value systems that will see us through, namely that the measure of a good life is one that overflows with things that softens life's blows: People. Love. Faith. Memories. Family. Trust. Friends. Unrealized dreams. All the rest will work itself out.
It's a weird moment to realize someone thinks they can do without us. It feels bad. But here we sit, with an exceptional work ethic and oodles of skills, watching a movie on a Tuesday afternoon that we could have starred in. How ironic.
Do you remember the part in You've Got Mail when Tom Hanks tried to use the lame excuse of 'It's nothing personal' to explain why he had put Meg Ryan's bookstore out of business and was skewered with the reply 'That just means it's not personal to you. But it's personal to me.' I think about that after the umpteenth call from a friend telling me they have joined the ranks of the unemployed. Does anyone even see us anymore?
In addition to the money thing, which is huge, people seem to be discovering they have inadvertently upended the value of jobs in their lives. Jobs are no longer just places they spend their time. People's lives have become subtexts to their jobs rather than the other way around. As long as things are in balance, life feels pretty good. There are buddies to lunch with and get togethers after work to commisserate over bosses. But when a layoff comes, and the shock wears off, what is left is a void where a life should be. No longer having the shared commonality thrusts them into exile as their job/career network dissolves.
I believe in the tried and true value systems that will see us through, namely that the measure of a good life is one that overflows with things that softens life's blows: People. Love. Faith. Memories. Family. Trust. Friends. Unrealized dreams. All the rest will work itself out.
Jan 5, 2010
BEGIN
I had really hoped that 2010 was the beginning of a new decade because I am sick and tired of this one. I had been gearing up to jumpstart the year and even talked myself into ceremoniously picking a word that would symbolize the decade ahead: BEGIN. (Thanks, Nat.)
It was cold on the walk the evening RMan keyed me in on the bad news that 2010 was actually still part of the decade we're in. You have no idea how seriously disappointed I was! All these thoughts are stuck here a whole year too early? There's nothing else to do but execute Plan A immediately and that involves my jazzy new word.
I'll grant you, 2009 was just about the hardest year ever. It changed the course of life. Terrible things went on everywhere and even my little part of the world was rocked off its axis by a job loss and the unstoppable fallout of insomnia and worry for my friends and family in the same boat. I was saddened by an indestructible friendship that took a direct hit and broken-hearted when the most beautiful light in the world was snuffed out at the tender age of eight. Lord, that was hard.
The 'aught' decade auspiciously also currently includes America's catastrophic fiscal erosion and a dwindling sense of confidence that we will be able to pull ourselves through. And there is this little matter of America's isolationary social erosion thanks to ipods and twitter and facebook and iphones - I mean, when was the last time you got a hand written thank you card or a forwarded joke with an actual personal message? And lastly, our sense of safety dissolved with terrorism grandstanding on September 11th.
We all sense America is losing its focus and its citizens are different because of it. Worker bees try to survive in a corporate America that has nothing to do anymore with the notions of loyalty, longevity and fair play. Sometime in the decade, the one without end, the world-changing 50-something boomers became old.
I wish I had listened better to those stories my mother and dad told of hard times and what it was like in the 1930s, what they endured and how. There will be clues there, ones we need. Our parents saw their parents ride out the Great Depression and survive it, and because of that they taught us and absolutely believed that anything is possible if you got an education, worked hard, were nice, took nothing for granted and wasted nothing. And I believe them. I do. I also know this is our moment to lead by example, when our families are looking to us to see what we do. Will we find the humility to do whatever it takes and persevere?
Life is definitely not going according to plan, but so what? Our grandparents kept the faith under infinitely worse circumstances. So in the last sucky year of a really bad decade, it's time to roll up our sleeves and get to it. Believe in ourselves and Begin again. Worrying whether we succeed or not will only get in the way.
It was cold on the walk the evening RMan keyed me in on the bad news that 2010 was actually still part of the decade we're in. You have no idea how seriously disappointed I was! All these thoughts are stuck here a whole year too early? There's nothing else to do but execute Plan A immediately and that involves my jazzy new word.
I'll grant you, 2009 was just about the hardest year ever. It changed the course of life. Terrible things went on everywhere and even my little part of the world was rocked off its axis by a job loss and the unstoppable fallout of insomnia and worry for my friends and family in the same boat. I was saddened by an indestructible friendship that took a direct hit and broken-hearted when the most beautiful light in the world was snuffed out at the tender age of eight. Lord, that was hard.
The 'aught' decade auspiciously also currently includes America's catastrophic fiscal erosion and a dwindling sense of confidence that we will be able to pull ourselves through. And there is this little matter of America's isolationary social erosion thanks to ipods and twitter and facebook and iphones - I mean, when was the last time you got a hand written thank you card or a forwarded joke with an actual personal message? And lastly, our sense of safety dissolved with terrorism grandstanding on September 11th.
We all sense America is losing its focus and its citizens are different because of it. Worker bees try to survive in a corporate America that has nothing to do anymore with the notions of loyalty, longevity and fair play. Sometime in the decade, the one without end, the world-changing 50-something boomers became old.
I wish I had listened better to those stories my mother and dad told of hard times and what it was like in the 1930s, what they endured and how. There will be clues there, ones we need. Our parents saw their parents ride out the Great Depression and survive it, and because of that they taught us and absolutely believed that anything is possible if you got an education, worked hard, were nice, took nothing for granted and wasted nothing. And I believe them. I do. I also know this is our moment to lead by example, when our families are looking to us to see what we do. Will we find the humility to do whatever it takes and persevere?
Life is definitely not going according to plan, but so what? Our grandparents kept the faith under infinitely worse circumstances. So in the last sucky year of a really bad decade, it's time to roll up our sleeves and get to it. Believe in ourselves and Begin again. Worrying whether we succeed or not will only get in the way.
Jan 3, 2010
Getting it Right
I've missed it here in thoughts I can re-read and obsess about. There has been so much going on, earth-shattering things, really good things that have pulled me away from the keyboard I love and into life.
There's the engagement for one, something I really didn't expect because those scary words kept backing up on me, words like 'who gives this woman' and 'obey', that made me never ever want to feel that way again, subservient and owned.
THIS TIME around those words/demands/rules are banished - kaput! - and so I can stay me for as long as we both shall live. That's a comfortable idea and I think this ring must catch the light even in the dark, it shines with such happiness. His face shines, too, as he talks in real time. We have a plan and a good one at that, already in motion, one piece and then another, a smile in agreement, and then another. A wedding. A life. We can hardly wait.
I seem to be lucky with finding choice parking spots and it happens over and over, even at Christmas or when its dinner hour, so I think it may actually be true: I am a parking fairie. That doesn't mean I'm not totally parking lot challenged when it comes to finding my blasted car in the lot, but give me the passenger seat and a ten minute window for errands and I will find you a choice spot even at Costco on the 3rd of July.
We've been wondering if this luck extends to love because things feel magical and wonderful and right, even after all this time together. Here we are among throngs of matchless people who are searching just as hard as we were, and we are stepping into a life we thought we'd never find. How lucky we are, really and truly, to finally get it right.
There's the engagement for one, something I really didn't expect because those scary words kept backing up on me, words like 'who gives this woman' and 'obey', that made me never ever want to feel that way again, subservient and owned.
THIS TIME around those words/demands/rules are banished - kaput! - and so I can stay me for as long as we both shall live. That's a comfortable idea and I think this ring must catch the light even in the dark, it shines with such happiness. His face shines, too, as he talks in real time. We have a plan and a good one at that, already in motion, one piece and then another, a smile in agreement, and then another. A wedding. A life. We can hardly wait.
I seem to be lucky with finding choice parking spots and it happens over and over, even at Christmas or when its dinner hour, so I think it may actually be true: I am a parking fairie. That doesn't mean I'm not totally parking lot challenged when it comes to finding my blasted car in the lot, but give me the passenger seat and a ten minute window for errands and I will find you a choice spot even at Costco on the 3rd of July.
We've been wondering if this luck extends to love because things feel magical and wonderful and right, even after all this time together. Here we are among throngs of matchless people who are searching just as hard as we were, and we are stepping into a life we thought we'd never find. How lucky we are, really and truly, to finally get it right.
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