I forgot. I forgot how great it feels to tap into energy sources with an exciting new job. I forgot the passion of a volunteer post. I forgot what being in love is like. I've been taking the hill at a run instead of pacing myself for the long haul.
Oops. One teensy assignment or meeting a month seems like a totally workable plan until it gains momentum and sucks everything into its vortex. That explains why I find myself daydreaming about a free day to rake the leaves and put out fall decorations...
You ever hear the rocks-in-the-jar analogy? According to internet lore, a college professor tries to illustrate a point by filling a wide mouth glass jar with river rocks. He asks his students if the jar is full. Yes, they say. He then adds to the jar a bucket of pea gravel, working it down between the rocks. How about now, he asks? Some students still say yes. Next, he pours sand in the jar which fills the spaces around the rock and gravel. And now? The students have caught on by now and remain silent. Lastly, the professor pours a pitcher of water to the brim.
What does this illustrate, he asks? One student suggests that no matter how full you think your life is, there's always room for more. But the professor answers, 'No. What it illustrates is you have to put the big rocks in first or you'll never get them in.'
Right on. The things we pick for our jars define who we are, the big rocks representing where we focus our energy. As we mature, we reorder our jars and rocks to reflect the changing people we are. I don't spend all my time devoted to the kids anymore, but they'll always be big rocks in my jar.
Lately, though, life has felt a little out of balance. I'll bet during the last reorg, I missed the down time rock. Gotta get back at that jar, as soon as I have time.
Oct 25, 2007
Oct 21, 2007
Night Lights
I love working with clay. Just like life, it's unpredictable, malleable, poignant: that is, until all hell breaks loose.
A six week triple-header with a death, a broken engagement, and three sons in transition made it feel like the chips were truly down. The reckless life of a teen became a fortunate blur. How grateful I was not to be able to imagine the chilling days ahead. Moments strung themselves into an adrenaline-forced heal. I grew accustomed to the dark as we survived it, and don't I know there are lots who can't say the same.
It's empty in that place you never want to be. A support circle can warm the periphery but it's your life, not theirs, and only you can take it on. Probably the best moment I've ever known is seeing a hand reaching down to give me a boost up. It makes a need in me to be that hand for someone else.
Last weekend in the American Cancer Society Relay for Life training class, I sat listening to a mother share her thoughts about facing her daughter's cancer. Yes, yes, I kept thinking, having a child on drugs feels like that, too. She spoke of the shock, the terror, the sense of powerlessness, the anger and reconciliation, the fight of their lives.
They say what doesn't kill you makes you strong. It surely strengthened my faith. These days, I live in hope and gratefulness for this personalized God who turned on the night light during those really long nights. I am forever shaped by it.
A six week triple-header with a death, a broken engagement, and three sons in transition made it feel like the chips were truly down. The reckless life of a teen became a fortunate blur. How grateful I was not to be able to imagine the chilling days ahead. Moments strung themselves into an adrenaline-forced heal. I grew accustomed to the dark as we survived it, and don't I know there are lots who can't say the same.
It's empty in that place you never want to be. A support circle can warm the periphery but it's your life, not theirs, and only you can take it on. Probably the best moment I've ever known is seeing a hand reaching down to give me a boost up. It makes a need in me to be that hand for someone else.
Last weekend in the American Cancer Society Relay for Life training class, I sat listening to a mother share her thoughts about facing her daughter's cancer. Yes, yes, I kept thinking, having a child on drugs feels like that, too. She spoke of the shock, the terror, the sense of powerlessness, the anger and reconciliation, the fight of their lives.
They say what doesn't kill you makes you strong. It surely strengthened my faith. These days, I live in hope and gratefulness for this personalized God who turned on the night light during those really long nights. I am forever shaped by it.
Oct 9, 2007
It's All in the Details
I was thinking today about love and honor. Some of us have this built-in cloaking device when we're called on to make significant decisions that affects those we love. A crossroads seems to drift us in the direction of wondering how they will be impacted. They're not just important to us, they are an integral part of us. We don't always do the right thing, but we always try to make it right.
Or not.
A friend recently separated from his wife and offered to help move some things to her new place. A pretty nice gesture, I thought, and certainly one I wouldn't have made during my divorce. I admired him knowing the importance of maintaining an amicable relationship for the sake of future family functions.
He took great care in boxing up things she had asked for, wrapping and marking them, moving large items into the truck and heading across town. While there, he noticed a decorative stone in her garden inscribed with her name and another man's, dated October '06. Coming face to face with proof of her infidelity must have been a blow, even with a marriage winding down. They had separated in January '07.
That stone was probably a really small thing to her, something she didn't give a second thought about at the time. She's not even considering the impact it will have on her kids and grandkids when they read the inscription and do the math. No cloaking device here!
Fifty something years on this soil and still living life as though she's the only one in it. That just blows my mind.
Or not.
A friend recently separated from his wife and offered to help move some things to her new place. A pretty nice gesture, I thought, and certainly one I wouldn't have made during my divorce. I admired him knowing the importance of maintaining an amicable relationship for the sake of future family functions.
He took great care in boxing up things she had asked for, wrapping and marking them, moving large items into the truck and heading across town. While there, he noticed a decorative stone in her garden inscribed with her name and another man's, dated October '06. Coming face to face with proof of her infidelity must have been a blow, even with a marriage winding down. They had separated in January '07.
That stone was probably a really small thing to her, something she didn't give a second thought about at the time. She's not even considering the impact it will have on her kids and grandkids when they read the inscription and do the math. No cloaking device here!
Fifty something years on this soil and still living life as though she's the only one in it. That just blows my mind.
Oct 7, 2007
Efficient!
Graciously shared from onceuponasmile.blogspot.com
An efficiency expert concluded his lecture with a note of caution: "Don't try these techniques at home."
"Why not?" asked somebody from the audience."I watched my wife's routine at breakfast for years," the expert explained. "She made many separate trips between the fridge, stove, table and cabinets, often carrying only a single item at a time. One day I told her, "You're wasting too much time. Why don't you try carrying several things at once?"
"Did it save time?" the guy in the audience asked.
"Actually, yes," replied the expert. "It used to take her 20 minutes to make breakfast. Now I do it in ten."
Oct 1, 2007
Be of Good Will
Outlets and Superstores are all the rage. In Folsom and Redding and San Jose and Gilroy, they sprout up like garlic. Fremont even turned an unsuccessful car manufacturing plant into a SuperMall. I guess regular old everyday stores are just too banal and unimpressive.
When I walk into an outlet store, I'm on the prowl. There's an opportunity to find one-of-a-kind items, stylish but not big sellers, priced to move. In we trapse with the promise of finding the deal of the day and out we come either disillusioned at not finding dirt-floor pricing or delerious about the leather jacket that was 60% off PLUS on the 50%-off-the-lowest-markdown rack. Woo Hoo.
The concept of a Superstore is one-stop shopping: groceries and fishing tackle and clothing and nursery and photo studio all in one convenient spot.
That said, you can imagine my surprise at discovering a Goodwill Outlet Store and a Goodwill Superstore on my way home from work. That's right: the repository for cast-off home and hearth items has an outlet and superstore. I can't begin to imagine a Superstore Goodwill. Please tell me they don't sell health and beauty items alongside used bedding.
But an Outlet store? Are they in a rush to move last season's items off the shelves for new used items? I don't GET it. Goodwill has an abundance of one of a kind items priced to sell already. What do they have, displays designed to snag impulse buyers with staged used furniture and snappy skirt/jacket combos?
This is a Goodwill store. How ridiculous to feel like they have to dress up what provides a great service to the community. I've gotta admit, though, I got a kick out of the sign proclaiming it is 'Open to the Public.' Whew! For a second there, I thought I'd need a membership card.
When I walk into an outlet store, I'm on the prowl. There's an opportunity to find one-of-a-kind items, stylish but not big sellers, priced to move. In we trapse with the promise of finding the deal of the day and out we come either disillusioned at not finding dirt-floor pricing or delerious about the leather jacket that was 60% off PLUS on the 50%-off-the-lowest-markdown rack. Woo Hoo.
The concept of a Superstore is one-stop shopping: groceries and fishing tackle and clothing and nursery and photo studio all in one convenient spot.
That said, you can imagine my surprise at discovering a Goodwill Outlet Store and a Goodwill Superstore on my way home from work. That's right: the repository for cast-off home and hearth items has an outlet and superstore. I can't begin to imagine a Superstore Goodwill. Please tell me they don't sell health and beauty items alongside used bedding.
But an Outlet store? Are they in a rush to move last season's items off the shelves for new used items? I don't GET it. Goodwill has an abundance of one of a kind items priced to sell already. What do they have, displays designed to snag impulse buyers with staged used furniture and snappy skirt/jacket combos?
This is a Goodwill store. How ridiculous to feel like they have to dress up what provides a great service to the community. I've gotta admit, though, I got a kick out of the sign proclaiming it is 'Open to the Public.' Whew! For a second there, I thought I'd need a membership card.
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