Along the Way

In the swirl of getting the place ready for wedding company we had a Saturday birthday celebration for Rman - 56 years as the crow flies, but he can still play the game just as well and jump high enough to find the jewels as he advances levels. In some ways he seems timeless.

Maybe it's because he still finds the world an interesting place. He digests news, watches Jeopardy, works hard, and oozes out that ex-hippie intellect and bawdy humor he is known for. The grandkids gobble up discussions on music and history, and I watch them build an unbreakable bond through thoughtful discussions and warm laughter. I wish he knew he is at his absolute best with children.

Naturally we've talked a lot about marriage recently and noticed the super successful marriages around us. Is there a secret? Maybe so. It looks like a great marriage has people in it who work in each other's bests interests every day, companionably exercising the muscles of generosity and thoughtfulness. That doesn't seem so mysterious.

They also seem to treat the marriage as something that stands on its own, a living breathing thing that is more than just the two of them. It makes sense that two makes it stronger than one but what I was surprised to learn is how the living part of marriage is defended. The best protection for a great marriage seems to be through the gentle nourishing tools of compromise, friendship, faith, steadfastness, patience and selflessness.

The simple lessons are often the toughest to learn. Through this, I am able to see that we already live some of the qualities of an exceptional marriage, in our deep love and devotion to each other and in the way we nurture it through compromise and commitment. Let's travel the rest of the way together, the three of us, as man and wife.