Homework

I've believed for a long time that life is cyclic: no, that's not precisely right. It feels more of a continuous loop with joints and cartilidge that can traverse life's obstacles. Sometimes it's not convenient to believe that, especially when life dishes out one bad event after another.

And God knows I have had years with so many balls in the air it blocked out the sun.

Over time, what came from reading the kinds of books I love is that there is positive and negative energy and a natural balance between the two. Whatever you want to name it (karma, mojo), there's a jarring moment when you become aware that your life is either in or out of balance.

God's in it all the way but there's free will to complicate matters, and our imperfect natures that tempt and cloud our judgment and misinterpret or manipulate life to our own advantage. Probably justification is the worst of our sins, because it pre-dates most of our bad decisions, but that's for another blog.

If balance is the goal, restraint is the means. There's shiny things everywhere to catch my eye, activities and chores and work and family that looks fun and engaging. I know this of me, that I want to fit it all in. There is a lesson I know but can't apply: that to keep an optimal balance, I can't do it all . Coming to a place where I can let go and be at peace with the limitations is my homework.