The Law of Averages

I hate to admit it but I think the guys are right on this one. Chicks are crazy.

A guy trying to win a woman will do a series of thoughtful and considerate things and, say, hit the mark 80% of the time. A woman thinks from that display that he understands her. He's encouraged that things are working nicely and sticks with the plan, trusting in the law of averages and the clues she gives him along the way. Life is good.

And then a crisis hits. It could be the death of someone close, the loss of self esteem, a crisis of faith. She pulls back, relying on her inner processing unit to work it through, and stops communicating while she desperately looks for safe footing. Sometimes she can do it herself; often she can't. She doesn't know anything about his law of averages. All she knows is that her man has met most of her needs up until this point, and she assumes he will know what she needs. Under these circumstances, his law of averages routine doesn't work and their relationship enters a crisis.

That's very true in friendships as well. Years and years of friendship assumes you know somebody through and through. It speaks to a level of trust that says -- I Will Be There. A crisis shatters even the best of friends when they don't know what to do, how to help, or when. I can only imagine how much harder it is for a guy to understand and react to the signs when as a woman I struggle like crazy. I sometimes drop the ball and miss the trail of bread crumbs, too.

This is a great reminder of how important communication is. When things seem dire and scary, whatever a woman says translates into needing a hand to hold. She can say whatever she wants, but those who love her need to stand by her, if only to hold the nightlight.