Step Off The Curb

Every once in a while an opportunity arises that makes me jump into it without regret. It occurred recently on a trip to the Southwest. I was powerfully drawn to walk upside down and fill my brain with unpasteurized life, to be shaken awake.

This I learned from Dan in the spring of 1976. A young Australian traveled from there to here to ask for my hand. All this way he came without knowing my feelings for him, all this way because of one evening we spent in Fiji that captured his imagination.

He was so sure, so confident, so ready … and the moment passed for this young college co-ed who was none of those things. He said he had no other choice but to try.

I’ve thought about him through the years, wondering how different the color and texture of life would have been if I had just taken his hand. I can’t imagine it, really, stepping off the curb, away from my studies and family and friends. If I had known how rare those moments really are, would he have flown home alone?

Memories are everlasting, but so are regrets. So in many ways, when situations arise, I feel more compelled to go, to know and feel and look and see, to draw the conclusions into my life. It is thrilling and companionable and invigorating.

Sometimes it is altogether different than I think it will be, more than I imagine but less than I hope. I want to draw into that world, loving it, savoring it, joyfully knowing it for myself. My heart restlessly seeks a safe harbor. There is wisdom in the risk, excitement in the knowledge that for me there is no other choice but to try.

Life is good when I step off the curb.